The Most Precious Gift

It was a beautiful Christmas night 40 years ago. I sat in my hospital bed waiting for the nurse to bring my precious new daughter to me. Something very special happened when I looked at that beautiful child and I knew my life would never be the same.

It was not just the beginning of her life, but the true beginning of mine and will always be the most precious gift I had ever received.

It's ok to burn the bread

When I was growing up holidays were particularly stressful events. Every time we attempted to gather together as a family there would be some unbelievable drama of some sort. Not your garden variety holiday angst but very difficult and painful situations for everyone.

When I had my own family I was able to finally have those beautiful and peaceful gatherings that filled my heart with joy. I am so very grateful that I have such a wonderful family that it's ok even if I burn the bread!

I love you with all of my heart and thank you for being my family!

Perfect Moments

I have been very blessed in my life to have had so many wonderful moments but there are few that compare to what I experienced tonight.

As my sweet grandson and I curled up on the sofa to watch "Winnie the Pooh" he wrapped his arms around me and fell fast asleep. I sat there just watching him and tears came to my eyes knowing that this is one of the most perfect moments of my life.

Begin Again

Every new day gives me the chance to be grateful for all of the blessings in my life.

Sitting at the airport or the DMV presents another opportunity to look at those around me and send them love. Instead of feeling frustration I like to send them wishes for what they might need in their lives (for some it is money, others it is peace or compassion - but for all it is love).

Life is so amazing and with each new day I begin again.

Laugh

I am a recovering serious person. I don't think I will ever totally break the habit but I am learning (little by little) that life should be fun and that I need to laugh much more!

Not just at myself but at life in general. I have had some lessons in that recently with a series of cosmic jokes. Situations that have helped me to see that I can either find the humor in it or let it ruin an otherwise delightful day.

I feel so much better when I can laugh instead of cry.

Hold on Loosely

One of the hardest things to do when you love someone is to not hold on too tight. It very quickly can turn from love into control and manipulation.

We all need to choose whatever it is that makes us happy and not fear losing those we love.

I think 38 Special said it best - Hold on loosely but don't let go....

Pave Your Journey with Joy

Each of us has to make our own way in the world. It is not so much the route we choose that makes the difference but how we see the path.  It can be a difficult climb against the steep terrain or a grand hillside adventure.  Whatever the circumstances, you will love the view at the top if you pave your journey with joy!

Circle of Life

June has been a month of both tremendous joy and deep sorrow in my life. There were births that filled my heart with delight and deaths that I thought I might not recover from.

All were events that changed me forever but now I can see it as the perfect unending circle of life.

Never Enough

Why is it that when we wish and hope for something and then attain it we feel the excitement diminished and we are left wanting more?

It is because our desire is the energy pulsing through us that is the unstoppable expansion of life.

Each time we accomplish what we desire we must ask for more because in the eternal pursuit of spirit it will never be enough.

Help Yourself First

The airlines have a safety instruction that in the event of an emergency you must put on your mask before assisting another passenger. The message is very clear – you cannot help anyone if you do not help yourself first.

If someone is ill you cannot help them if you aren’t healthy, if they are poor you cannot help if you are living in poverty. But if you are thriving and well you will have so much more to give.

If you want to be of true assistance to others you must always help yourself first!

Defining Moments

We all have defining moments in our lives, the instant that something occurs that changes us forever. For me one of those moments came last year when my grandson was born.

To say that it was a life altering experience would be an understatement. The immense joy that has filled my heart is more than I could have ever hoped for.

In one miraculous moment everything became very clear and suddenly I understood all that was good and possible in the world.

Happy 1st Birthday to my precious baby!

Create in Your Own Space

No one can create anything in your life that you don't allow and you cannot create for anyone else. Each of us is ultimately responsible for what we choose.

It is a very difficult lesson for me but I must keep my focus on the life that I want and remember that I can only create in my own space.

Transitioning

I heard something beautiful recently that has really stayed with me. We need to let the changes and growth in our lives occur in a gentle and easy way.

It is like a large ship passing through locks to adjust to the different levels of the water. You can’t do it in giant leaps but you can transition in small steps so the change is seamless.

Forever Young

Today is my mother's birthday, she would have been 88 years old. How I would have loved to see her at such a glorious age.

Always so full of life and energy, she was a vibrant and loving woman. In my heart she will always be forever young.

Excess

How very blessed am I that the only ills I suffer are that of excess. If my jeans are too tight it is because I have more than enough food to eat. If I am stressed from travel it is because I have more than enough money to pay for it.

The struggle and lack of my childhood have disappeared into a wealth of riches. Now I must show my gratitude by sharing my good fortune.

Teeth Marks

I laughed tonight when I saw the teeth marks on the edge of the table. My grandson is old enough now to pull himself up on the furniture and sink his brand new teeth into the table, leaving his tiny little imprint.

I'm sure Mom and Dad don't think it is so cute - but Grandma thinks it is just adorable! Life is very, very good!!!

Precious Time

Nothing is as transient as time. Everything except for right now is an illusion - the past is gone and tomorrow is not here and yet that is where most of us spend our time.

It is very difficult to stay connected to the present moment, especially with all the outside influences that occupy our minds. I try to be still at least one moment each day just to experience nothing but being here, right now.

“Precious time is slipping away, you’re only King for a day” – Van Morrison

Loss

Today I heard of another friend who lost their mother.... It gives me great pause to hear that news. It instantly brings me back to that life altering moment almost 19 years ago when my own mother passed.

There is nothing you can say or do, it is only the love and sympathy you feel deep in your heart for anyone who experiences such a loss. You know their life will never be the same.

Mirror Mirror

What do we see when we look into the mirror. So often we don't even acknowledge what is really there. Do we see the beauty that exists in each of us or do we focus on the imperfections?

Most often what we see in others is only a reflection of what we hide from ourselves. There is a lot to learn if we can see what is really in the mirror.

What do I Support

Most of what we learn in the world is protest, being against something in one form or another. What I am beginning to learn now is that every time we push against something the other side becomes further out of reach.

If I want peace and prosperity in my life then I have to concentrate on that and not on war or poverty.

If energy flows where thoughts go then I want my full attention to be on those things that I love and support!

Treasure Hunt

Life is full of treasure, not buried but out in plain sight if we just look for it. It is so easy to notice those things that we don't like but if we change our perspective we will see the precious gems that are all around us.

Sometimes I make a game of it and see how many things I can find when I am going about my normal day. Maybe a sweet child smiled at me or I saw someone helping someone in need. No matter where I am I always find things that touch my heart and make me smile.

Go on a treasure hunt of your own and see what you can find.

Perfect Time

Sometimes it can be difficult to accept that things don’t happen exactly when we want them to. So often we try to control it and then we are disappointed in the outcome.

There is a beautiful unfolding to life and it will all happen in the perfect way and at the perfect time.

Spotlight

There has been a wonderful change that has occurred in me. I no longer feel the need to resist much of anything. Those things that I once felt compelled to push back against are part of someone else’s struggle, not mine.

Now I spend my energy more wisely and focus on the things that I care about most – love, family and compassion. Keeping the spotlight on the beauty makes everything else pale in comparison.

Sharing

Every day is a new opportunity to share the blessings I have in my life. What is so unbelievable to me is that the more I give the more I receive and it just continues to grow…

Today it was as simple as waiting patiently at the grocery store behind people who had to use assistance to pay for their food, or giving the sweet woman $20 for the delicious tamales she sells in the parking lot.

It reminds me how truly fortunate I am and how I always want to find ways to share that with others.

Transported

I love those things that transport me in time. Like watching an old movie or hearing a great song from my childhood. Having that lovely memory is not a wish to go back but more of a confirmation of how I became who I am now.

Feeling all the intense emotions I had as a young girl combined with the life experience of a grown woman is very exhilarating to me. It’s like being a time traveler and having the best of all worlds!

Clues

Sometimes I get so caught up in the excitement of something that I get ahead of myself. That is usually when things begin to go off track. Moving in a direction I may not really want to go.

It is very important that I pay attention to the clues I am receiving. Not just to the beautiful, idealistic picture I have in my head! I get many internal and external signals when things are not quite lining up and yet many times I forge ahead. Experience tells me that is not a wise thing to do.

If I want to have no regrets I must respect the information being provided and be willing to make adjustments along the way.

Keep the Faith

It is always easier to forget than to remember but we must trust that everything will work out exactly as it needs to. Recently I was in a situation that was very frustrating and I did everything I could to find the positive side of it and was not very successful.

It did occur to me that this might be something good in disguise but I wasn’t totally convinced. I really should know better by now – I just laughed when I found out that by one thing not working the way I wanted was an avenue for something very important to be possible!

They say God works in mysterious ways - all we have to do is keep the faith!

Joy Arises From Within

In the "Power of Now" Eckhart Tolle defines pleasure as something that comes from the external but that true joy arises from within.

What a beautiful distinction!

5 Years Ago

5 years ago I entered what might be the most significant time of my life so far. As I turned 50 I longed for more meaning and desperately needed to discover what was next for me. So without any hesitation I quit my job, put my house up for sale, packed all of my belongings and moved to another country.

With 1 suitcase and no plan I wanted to see what might unfold. What occurred was more than I could have ever hoped for. It turned into 6 of the best months of my life with so many wonderful experiences that I will never forget.

It was exactly what I needed to change the direction of my life. More than anything what going away did was to bring me back home - physically, spiritually and emotionally.

The Key

There have been many times in my life when it seemed that everything I wanted was locked away somewhere just out of my reach. I did not know or understand how easy it might be to get to it.

Consumed with the stress and anxiety of life and family, I moved forward in the best way I knew how. Now I realize that it does not have to be so difficult.

For me it was as simple as being profoundly grateful for every single moment that I am alive. From the minute I wake until I close my eyes to sleep I thank the Universe for all the unbelievable blessings in my life.

That was it, that was the key that unlocked the door and everything I ever wanted in my life came pouring in.

Shangri La

Do you know Shangri La - that mystical earthly paradise described so beautifully in "Lost Horizon"? A place of peaceful beauty, where there is no struggle only harmony and joy.

Utopia can be found if we allow ourselves to release our fears and let the love in our hearts blossom. Just like the character in the novel, once we have experienced Shangri La we will do anything to return……

1 Year On...

I have been writing this blog for a year now, who would have known that I would have so much to say! There was a torrent of emotion in my head and my heart that was crying to be released.

This has been such a cathartic and liberating experience for me. To allow my deepest thoughts and feeling to be expressed – and to put it out there for the world to see. That was the biggest risk of all and I am so grateful that I did!

This is helping me to heal and grow in ways I never expected. Here’s to yet another year of letting my true voice be heard!

Grandparenthood

Since the birth of my grandson last year I have wondered why I was so surprised at the experience of being a grandmother. How could I be that unprepared for how I would feel?

But then I remember my own mother, a very strong and serious woman who melted into love and warmth when she was with her grandchildren. That should have told me how profound this experience might me.

Now I realize that no one can prepare you because there are no words to express the pure love and joy you feel when these precious gifts come into your life.

This Day

This day never fails to remind me of all that we have accomplished and how far we still have to go.

I was just a young girl when my family drove cautiously down the streets of Iowa as the protesters lined up on the sidewalks. Heavily armed with baseball bats, chains and knives, it was a terrifying sight.

I remember being very confused about why this was happening. When I looked at the people as we passed by I didn’t see color or any difference at all. They were all the same to me, every face was filled with fear.

My deepest prayer for this day and always is that people everywhere will hear Dr. King's beautiful message and know peace.

Rate of Change

The rate of change in my life has increased at a remarkable speed this past year; gaining a momentum and force that I couldn’t stop if I tried. That is saying a lot considering how quickly my life evolves. But to see it advance at this pace is truly astonishing!

What is even more interesting is that it is not because I am doing more or going faster but because I have slowed down and become more mindful of what truly matters to me.

These changes are creating a deeper more meaningful experience in my life.

Speak Softly

In the past, I have been very harsh and critical of myself. I didn't feel good enough or worthwhile and it hurt my heart.

Finally, I understand that I cannot ask of someone else what I am not willing to give to myself.

Now I know I must speak softly - because I am talking to my heart!

Life’s Adventure

When I was a little girl I loved to read about other people and faraway places. I was fascinated by all the wonderful things that existed and suddenly my world didn’t seem so small or bleak.

Like a little explorer I set out on an adventure, I wanted to discover as much as I could. Those stories gave me hope that I too could have a beautiful and wondrous life!

Relationships

Something I have come to understand about myself is that casual and superficial relationships don’t suit me. I can do that for short periods of time but it doesn’t hold my interest.

It is the experience of that deep, rich connection with someone I care about that is truly satisfying.

Life in Full Bloom

I’m not sure how it happens but my life just keeps getting better and better. Every new day, every new year is fuller and richer than the last. Just when I think it can’t be improved upon something else happens to enhance the beauty.

I have always known that I was a fortunate woman, not always with the best circumstances. But there is no question that this must have been the right path or I would never have ended up in this glorious place with my life in full bloom!